the whole “i’m an evil monster because i have to kill and eat innocent people to survive :’(” angst in ‘regular human gets turned into supernatural monster’ stories is so stupid. like how is that even a problem??? there are also plenty of corrupt billionaires, abusers and cops out there for you to snack on
everybody’s like “eating the rich is the only ethical consumption under
capitalism” until they actually have the opportunity to actually eat the
rich 🙄 smh
what we do in the shadows is the only one that Gets It
People who don’t want to read The Martian in case the science is too complicated should be informed that it contains the lines “The best way to store the ingredients of water is to make them be water”, “It is of course dangerous to set off an explosive device on a spacecraft”, and “If I cut a hole in the wall of the hab, the air won’t stay inside any more”.
I love this fucking book
“I’ve said the words kilowatt-hours-per-sol so many times they’ve lost all meaning so I’m going to call them pirate-ninjas.
“So I need to generate nine hundred pirate-ninjas…”
there’s an entire chapter dedicated to him wondering how the cubs are doing while he’s stuck on mars, dying
I like the part where the guys on Earth are like “He thinks we all gave up on him, and that he’s completely alone. I wonder what he’s thinking about right now.”
And he’s like “How come Aquaman can control whales?”
“
As with most of life’s problems, this one can be solved by a box of pure radiation.
“
“Actually, I was the very lowest ranked member of the crew. I would only be “in command” if I were the only remaining person.”
Two pages later… “What do you know? I’m in command”
“Me: “This is obviously a clog. How about I take it apart and check the internal tubing?” NASA: (after five hours of deliberation) “No. You’ll fuck it up and die.” So I took it apart.
And my personal favorite :”
Also, I have duct tape. Ordinary duct tape, like you buy at a hardware store. Turns out even NASA can’t improve on duct tape.
Yes, of course duct tape works in a near-vacuum. Duct tape works anywhere. Duct tape is magic and should be worshiped.”
Fun fact: actual astronauts on the moon once used duct tape to fix a moon rover. People who actually work at NASA loved this movie, not because of all the science and engineering, but because most of them are actually this ridiculous.
I’ll never understand why anthropomorphic animal cartoons like Robin Hood and Zootopia will go to the trouble of creating character designs that are meant to be understood as “attractive” or even “sexy” to the human audience but explicitly avoid showing interspecies romances between anthropomorphic animals. Why is THAT weird but, like, trying to make rabbits recognizably sexy-coded to humans isn’t?
Sometimes, sure, but why was Maid Marian a fox in Robin Hood? There wasn’t anything particularly “foxlike” about her personality, and it would make more sense for her to be a lion. They made her a fox only because Robin was a fox and making her something else would be “weird”, but I don’t think the wolf cop or the chicken maid or the lion prince were actually meant to represent race.
The best inter species couple is Kermit and Miss Piggy as the Cratchits in A Muppet Christmas Carol, because all their sons are frogs and all their daughters are pigs, as God clearly intended.
there are only two genders: frog and pig
I’ve pointed out to my friends that the fact that Kermit and Miss Piggy’s kids are like that means either
1) they reproduce asexually and the children are clones of each parent OR
2) Kermit and Miss Piggy are members of the same sexually dimorphic species, hence the split between their male and female children
yes I have spent too long running about potential muppet biology
oh god
Third option, when they want kids they get some fabric and make one, and hope a Hand inhabits it
Do you think there’s a ritual for inviting An Inhabiting Hand to possess the empty husk of your muppet baby?
Just wanted to show u guys that in Muppets Most Wanted, Piggy fantasizes about her and Kermit having babies and this is what they look like
So do with that what you will
Recall that in The Great Muppet Caper, Kermit and Fozzie are brothers. And this was their dad (right):
Thank you for specifying, which one of the two individuals in the picture was the dad haha
I, for one, think Shrek handled interspecies coupling the best. By this I am of course talking about the Dronkeys.
In season 3 of BoJack Horseman, we learn Diane (middle) has been impregnated by Mr. Peanutbutter (left). The fetuses are confirmed to be puppies.
This is the worst addition to this post
I am reminded of Treasure Planet.
In which Captain Amelia (left), an extra terrestrial anthropomorphic cat, had hybrid babies with Doctor Doppler (middle), an extra terrestrial anthropomorphic dog, whom also gave birth to the babies
I always thought that in muppet movies like muppet Christmas Carol the characters are played by the muppets (so kermit is acting and playing the role of Bob rather than being him) so the kids in that film would just be other acting muppets right?
Or is that just something my brain made up?
Last time I saw this post (YESTERDAY) it stopped at the second Eggman
What are you laughing at over there Jon?
“Oh, it would take way to long too explain…. its a three Eggman situation”
